by Liz Masters

For the Week of April 4, 2016

Secrets, betrayals, and shifting alliances are shaking things up, but is that a good thing, or are lackluster reveals, disappointing developments, and questionable choices a sign of things to come?

Hayden Barnes is Rachel Berlin. Please, explain why I should care? This "shocking" revelation was completely anticlimactic and frankly a bit baffling.

Rachel is the daughter of a Ponzi scheme scammer who bilked people out of billons and went to jail. Many believed that Rachel was complicit in her father's crimes and vanished with a sizable fortune that Raymond had hidden away, which is why the Feds want to have a little chat with her.

Naturally, Hayden proclaims that she is innocent and was as shocked as the rest of the world when her father was busted and carted off to jail. Of course, Nikolas doesn't believe Hayden because he just caught her with her hand in the proverbial till trying to transfer ownership of ELQ from him to her.

Absolutely none of this nonsense interested me.

The plot holes in this storyline are enormous, starting with the fact that Nikolas and Hayden's marriage isn't even valid, since Hayden couldn't legally change her name while she remained under federal investigation. There is also the fact that ELQ is comprised of shareholders, and even though Nikolas currently has the majority of the shares, he is not the sole owner of the company. Marrying Hayden and transferring those shares to her wouldn't have mattered if the courts decide that Jason is legally entitled to get back his shares of ELQ, since he is, in fact, not dead.

It's also ludicrous to think that numerous people have investigated Hayden, but only Tracy -- with a cocktail in hand and a few spare hours one afternoon on her computer tablet -- was able to uncover Hayden/Rachel's deep, dark secret. So much for Sam and Spinelli's supposedly stellar detective and cyber skills.

Even Liz did a better job than Sam by simply looking up Naomi Dreyfus' name online and clicking a few links. Why didn't Sam do that before she traipsed over to Spoon Island to tell Nikolas about the mystery phone number? Better yet, why didn't Spinelli look into Naomi before contacting Sam?

Don't get me wrong, I love Rebecca , but I had hoped "Rachel" had an actual connection to Port Charles beyond her father swindling Scott out of a fortune.

I expected fireworks when the truth about Hayden was finally exposed, and what I got was one measly little firecracker -- the kind that you buy in a grocery story, not the kind you pick up on the side of the road from a sketchy dude who only deals in cash.

Despite the boring reveal, the potential for excitement was there. The vicious war of words between Liz and Hayden, the slap, and Nikolas walking out on Hayden were great. However, it all quickly fizzled when Nikolas got settled in his hotel suite and called Spencer. Suddenly, Nikolas had second thoughts because Spencer adores Hayden, and Nikolas went into the marriage not trusting her.

First, no one should ever take romantic advice from a child, especially Spencer, who has proven to be a very poor judge of character indeed. Remember Britt?

Second, how can you possibly have true love without genuine trust? What Nikolas feels for Hayden is lust. Pure, unadulterated lust with a heavy dose of masochism thrown in for good measure.

I realize that Nikolas doesn't have any room to judge Hayden because he ordered a hit man to kill her, but it wasn't unprovoked. Hayden threatened Nikolas on every level -- including his son's future -- and Nikolas reacted as a Cassadine does. Hayden knew exactly who she was tangling with when she called his bluff and marched down to the garage to tell Jason that Nikolas and Elizabeth had been keeping a secret.

In the end, Hayden lived to scam another day and broke Nikolas' heart in the process, so they've each done horrible things to the other. I get that Hayden believes she fell in love with Nikolas along the way, but that's the price you pay when you deceive the one you claim to love.

Just ask Liz. Her penance is watching Jason and Sam fall in love all over again.

I hope the convoluted mess between Nikolas and Hayden is catalyst for Nikolas and Liz finally getting a real relationship. Hayden will be fine -- there are plenty of eligible bachelors in town -- including a guy with a lizard!


Although, I'm not sure that Finn is considered a good catch right now, judging by the frequent bouts of weakness, shakes, and unexplained sweats he suffers that send him scurrying to his hotel suite to grab a tourniquet and glass syringe that appears to have been stolen from Sherlock Holmes's collection.

I'm still on the fence about Finn, but I am looking forward to Nina running into him. They are both quirky enough that the encounter should be interesting. Finn might also provide Nina with an alternative option if Franco remains determined to only be interested in other people's children.

Meanwhile, Kristina decided to come out to Alexis and told her mother all about Parker. Unfortunately, Kristina has her father's penchant for drama and overreacting to any given situation, so it didn't go very well.

The first half of Kristina's talk with Alexis was wonderful because Alexis listened calmly and let Kristina get everything out. However, it all went south when Alexis dared to react as I think many parents would when their child springs something on them completely out of left field.

As a parent, you want to believe that you know everything that's going on in your child's life -- at least the important things. It's devastating to realize that you were so completely disconnected from your baby that you had no inkling something major was going on, whether it's learning your teenager is pregnant, your son or daughter joined the military without discussing it with you first, or they announce they are taking off to travel the world because they are adults and can.

Being told that your child is gay when you had no clue that it was even on their radar can be a lot for a parent to process. It doesn't mean they have a problem with homosexuality -- it just means they are gobsmacked.

I love that Lucas reminded Kristina of this, but I hate the way Kristina is treating her mother. I think Alexis has every right to have concerns about Parker because Parker is older and a person of authority who'd had Kristina suspended from school for inappropriate conduct. On top of that, Parker randomly shows up on Kristina's doorstep and dispenses advice that she has no right to give, since she's already caused Kristina so much trouble.

It bothers me that Parker hasn't been held accountable for her own conduct because I definitely believe that Parker encouraged Kristina by sending mixed signals. I've seen it with my own eyes each time Parker has visited Kristina. All doubts were erased when I saw that kiss between Kristina and Parker.

I also agree with Alexis that perhaps Kristina's history with men has a lot to do with Kristina's attraction to Parker. It's possible that Kristina's last breakup awaked a deep-seated desire Kristina had subconsciously harbored for women, or it could be Kristina's way of trying to protect herself from getting hurt again. Whatever the case, I think Kristina should see a therapist to figure it all out before she gets involved with someone. If for no other reason than to find out why she gravitates toward people who treat her like crap.

I suspect that Kristina is painting her mother as the villain by making unfair and untrue accusations to build up her defenses for when Sonny finds out. Kristina fears the worst and is basically using Alexis for a test run to prepare herself for the battle she'll face with the family's other diva -- her father.

Speaking of Sonny, I want to smack him every time he taunts Julian or talks about sending Julian to jail for Duke's murder.

I loved Duke, and hated to see him die, but he was a mobster, and unfortunately he took over for Sonny, knowing the risk. Additionally, Duke wasn't exactly innocent. He, too, had Julian in his crosshairs. The mob life is ruthless and dangerous, so there really are no innocent victims when it comes to gangsters gunning each other down.

In truth, Sonny was the one who killed an innocent man in cold blood when he shot A.J. A.J. didn't deserve to die, yet Sonny eventually got away with the crime when he garnered the gratitude of the governor and was granted clemency. That's why Sonny just needs to shut up when it comes to telling people they belong in jail. Each time he flaps his gums about it, he sounds like an ignorant hypocrite.

I also can't stand that ridiculous sing-song voice Sonny uses whenever he tries to goad people. It's not intimidating. It's annoying, and I'm surprised that someone hasn't punched him in the face yet when he does it.

I prefer when Sonny is made to look intelligent, like in his scenes with Brick and Anna when he was scheming to tap Paul's cell phone to track down Carlos or when he talks to Morgan about what it's like to live with bipolar disorder. That's when I find Sonny likeable.

I hope, for Morgan's sake, that Kiki doesn't end up falling for Griffin before Morgan gets well, but I honestly wouldn't blame her if she did.

Griffin is definitely a wonderful addition to the cast, but please keep him out of Maxie's orbit because I don't want Maxie turning to Griffin now that she's reeling from the news that Nathan had once been married.

Nathan and Maxie are perfect together, and I want them to have a storyline -- but not one that threatens their relationship. We have so few genuinely good couples on the show that make me smile and warm my heart. Nathan has made Maxie a better person and far more likeable than she was during her dysfunctional relationship with Spinelli. She's matured and developed a real conscience, and she takes responsibility for her actions. I don't want her to backslide by turning self-destructive and losing the best thing that's ever happened to her.

I want Nathan and Maxie to have a happily ever after and maybe a baby or two. I certainly don't want all of that to be ruined by Griffin or Claudette, who seems destined to make an appearance in Port Charles, given how many times she's been mentioned and how uncomfortable Nathan is talking about her.

Griffin totally scored points when he admitted that he preferred to keep his distance from Maxie because he was attracted to her but he respected that she had a boyfriend. I don't want him to go back on his word and compromise his integrity because it's a redeeming quality that too few people in Port Charles have.

Finally, is or isn't Julian back in the mob? It appears that he might have made a pact with the devil to spare his sister's life. If that is the case, I'm going to be royally pissed because I loved that Julian proved Sonny wrong by showing that it is possible to successfully leave the mob.

Then again, these days the mob is being written to be an annex of the police department. Sonny engages in illegal activity to keep Port Charles safe from bad mobsters. *Rolls eyes*

Enough with calling out Liz for having three children by three different men. Alexis and Carly each have three children by three different men. And then there's Sonny, who has four living children with four different women. Liz is far from an oddity, and it's getting tiresome to hear her constantly called out for something that nearly everyone in that town is guilty of.

I loved the visit from Emma, but I fear it will be the last as Josslyn is aged and Jake is about to be aged. I have to say, I enjoy Eden McCoy's Josslyn because she's a lot less creepy and potential-serial killer-like than the past versions.

The thug names are cracking me up. Julian has "Hammer" working for him, and Sonny has a "Brick." All they are missing are a "Rock," "Paper," and "Scissors."

Finn asks Epiphany to call if there's a change in Tracy's condition
Finn: "Nurse Johnson, you have my cell phone number in case anything comes up?"
Epiphany: "On speed dial."
Finn: "Is that -- is that still a thing?" [Epiphany picks up desk phone and hits two numbers. Seconds later, Finn's phone rings.]
Finn: "I'll be damned."

I often talk about the great messages and thoughts that readers share. This week, I wanted to include some of them in the column!

• I was excited to see Helena back, but the will reading was sort of boring...I wanted something explosive to happen at the reading! I'm hoping some excitement will happen as a result of what Helena left everyone. -- IK

• The story with Parker might be more interesting if we ever saw her! Her showing up in Port Charles more often to mess with Kristina would be a more fun story and would really keep Kristina off balance wondering if others might see them together, especially her parents! -- Kymba O

Now, I turn the spotlight on you, dear readers. Please, share your thoughts about the show in the Comments section below or on the Soap Central message boards, or simply click here. I love reading what everyone has to say.

Until next time, take care.
Liz Masters

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